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Eating Myself

Chanee Choi, Eating Myself, A performance video installation with a real-time performance, 2016

The concept for Eating Myself came to me from my nightmares. I dreamt about literally consuming myself in one piece. In the end, I completely disappeared. I questioned the meaning of my dream and what it meant for my future. I was full of fear.

It made me ask myself, “What would happen if I ate myself?” “Would I become twice as big or would I disappear?” I wanted to transform these questions into a positive experience that expressed my feminist views. I chose to express my fear and shame through this performance because of its ritualistic properties and repetitive nature. It helped me open up my feelings of shame and heal from this season of difficult experiences.